Sleepless Night
by jimalim320
Summary: My continuation of season 5. Starting with 5X06 each chapter follows the cannon of the newest episode of the season. Just a way to add the Emison scenes we are not getting on the show, but still following the cannon storyline.
1. 5X06

**A/N: Hey there! My first Emison fanfic, I've dabbled in Jori, Rizzles, Fimogen, and Maxoline before so I have some experience writing these kinds of things, I would love if you would check those out too if you are part of any of those fandoms. I love Emison and I'm really hoping for endgame. This story is my take on what would have happened the morning after 5x06 where Emily stayed up all night watching over Alison. It is a little rough cause I wanted to get it up before the new episode, but please review/comment to let me know what you think. Who knows I might just continue it if enough people seem to take to it. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy!**

*Set in 5X06 the morning after Emily stayed up all night watching over Alison to make sure she's safe.*

It had been a long night, long day, hell a long two years. Alison had been attacked by **A**, or part of the **A** Team, they weren't really sure who, earlier that day. Emily had come over to convince Ali to not leave Rosewood again. She was gonna kill Hanna for trying to help her escape. She came in to notice **A **standing over Ali. She didn't wait a second before reacting, trying to take down **A**, but was unfortunately unsuccessful. She embraced Alison in her arms, who in turn clung right back. They stayed like that for what felt like hours, seeking comfort in each other's arms.

Anybody would say Emily showed up in the nick of time to save Alison from her inevitable death, but Emily thought otherwise. It all seemed too sudden, after all the years of torment A would show up out of the blue and kill Ali? It didn't make much sense. But that thought didn't keep Emily from thinking she was safe. And that's why she was awake at 4am, not sleeping a moment since Ali went to bed. Even though she strongly believed A was only trying to scare her with that attack, she wasn't naive enough to think it was over. Ali didn't want to be alone tonight, and Emily didn't blame her, she doesn't think she would ever want to be alone if she'd experienced everything Ali has been through. She tucked her in hours ago, yet she remained on top of the covers, never even fully laying down, in fear that sleep would overtake her and she wouldn't be able to watch over Alison.

She stayed up all night replaying all the day's events, the past week, the past month; everything leading up to Alison's death all the way through her return and then some. When did everything become so crazy? It was a question that came to her mind often when she was searching for answers, and she had yet to pinpoint a moment where everything went wrong. It, along with other questions, racked her brain giving her plenty to think about over the next few hours before Alison woke up.

The Next Morning:

Alison rolled over slowly, stretching lightly; she didn't expect to see Emily, still in her shirt and jeans from the night before sitting atop the covers. She was cross legged in the middle of the bed staring at the window. She didn't even react when Ali sat up next to her. Ali gently placed her hand on Emily's upper arm, immediately noticing the tiredness on Emily's face, "Em, did you get any sleep last night?"

It took a moment for Emily's brain to register what Alison just said. She was quiet for a second before answering without her gaze straying from the window, **"A** might have just woken up from her nap, so I'm not settling down for mine." Her voice was scratchy and deep from her lack of sleep.

"Em, you have to sleep." Her hand slowly moved from Emily's arm across her back, ultimately resting in the small of her back. "Come on why don't you rest now?" Ali asked concerned. She tried to gently coax Emily into lying down.

Emily turned around to look at Alison for the first time that morning. Ali could see the amount of hurt, and worry that was conflicting Emily in her eyes. Emily quietly asked, "How will I know you won't get on a train and never come back?"

Ali instantly felt terrible, finally understanding why Emily stayed up all night. She was so scared Ali would leave again. Ali got up from the bed for a moment to go grab a book and her new diary from her purse, placing them on the bedside table before sitting against the headboard, "Here…" Alison took Emily's hand in hers and squeezed it tight, "that way you know I'm not going anywhere" she nodded at Emily motioning for her to lie down, "I promise I'll wake you up if anything seems out of the ordinary." Emily hesitated, "Please?" Ali added almost pleadingly.

Emily gave in and finally settled down under the covers, lying on her side facing Alison, hands still intact. Only a few minutes later sleep overtook her. Thankful Emily was finally getting some much needed rest; Alison grabbed her diary of the table. She wrote for a couple hours, everything from the moment she came back to Rosewood was cleverly recorded under the guise of little mini fairytales, much like the diary the girls found when they were still searching for Alison. She contemplated the past week, returning to school, Mona, the explosion, the **A** attack from the day before.

But what she couldn't get out of her mind was the girl sleeping right next to her. How safe she felt around her, how she was the only one who saw the goodness in her before the incident, how no matter how hard she tried to push her away she would always stand her ground. Looking back she now knew she always had a natural connection with her, but ignored it. It wasn't until she 'died' that she really began to evaluate her life and her feelings. She knew that being here with her was all she wanted.

Her thoughts were interrupted when Emily stirred in her sleep rolling onto her back, in turn pulling their conjoined hands onto her stomach. The position contorted Ali's arm uncomfortably, so she lied down on her side facing Emily. She studied Emily's resting face, even when she was asleep Ali could still see the pain in her features, furrowed brow, eyes shut tight, the muscles around her mouth tense. Ali couldn't help it; she reached out to brush a stray hair behind Emily's ear. Emily's face relaxed at the touch, and Ali began to slowly run her thumb across her cheek.

Eventually the contact caused Emily to wake up. Ali quickly pulled her hand away, her face began to flush, she muttered a quiet apology, "S-sorry, I..."

Emily gave her a look that said 'it's ok'

Ali smiled relieved and lightly squeezed their intertwined hands. Emily had forgotten they were still holding hands and pulled away quickly sitting up in bed. She turned her back toward Alison as she checked her phone.

Unbeknown to Emily, Ali is hurt by Emily's rejection and is visibly upset; she also sits up in bed and cautiously questions, "Em? Are we ever gonna talk about the other night?"

Emily has an internal flashback to the last time they had a sleepover. She had initiated the kiss, but Alison deepened it, and before she knew it Alison was on top of her ready to take things to the next level, but Emily had stopped it. She didn't want to rush whatever it was that they had, so instead they spent the rest of the night wrapped up in each other's arms, stealing a kiss every now and then, but never addressing what exactly they were doing. So when Alison asked to stay over last night she hesitated, she was too angry and upset to deal with any kind of romantic feelings. It wasn't until Alison promised they would just sleep, that she let her guard down and accepted.

Emily turned around to face Ali but remained quiet. She wasn't ready for this conversation, but she knew Ali wasn't going to let it go without a fight.

Ali took Emily's silence as her cue to continue, it was now or never, "I know you're confused and probably pissed," Emily rolled her eyes at that statement, more like understatement she thought, "and I completely understand that, believe me I do. But we can't keep up this hot and cold thing forever." Ali waited holding her breath for Emily's response.

Emily sat there looking forward, but still able to see Ali out of her peripheral vision, "Alison, I just…" she refused to make eye contact, and her voice got really small, "When?" And that was it, yet Ali knew exactly what that one word meant, 'When as in when did things change? When did you begin to have these feelings?' She knew when they were to finally have this conversation that this would be the question that would make or break their relationship; that this was probably the only thing Emily cared about. All those times she made Emily believe her feelings weren't returned, that she would never love her the way Emily wanted.

Alison knew this question was coming, and she actually had an answer, "The night my mom…." She hesitated, she could feel the tears beginning to well up in her eyes, "my mom burred me."

Emily shook her head trying to ward off the tears that were welling in her own eyes.

Alison, trying hard to fight the tears elaborated, "I kept thinking about you." Emily turned to look at her waiting for more. "I was afraid, not just for myself, but for you. I knew I was going to die, but all I could think about was you, how my death would affect you, how a part of you would die with me."

Emily became outraged, she got off the bed starting to pace with her arms crossed over her chest. She knew Alison meant well, but she just couldn't believe how damn arrogant she sounded. "You're wrong Ali. Part of me didn't die with you," she stared daggers at Alison, "All of me died that day!" The tears that had been edging the corner of her eyes began to fall, "and to know you were alive this whole time…" she became defensive again, "two years Ali! Two years!" The tears flowing faster, "Two years ago I lost my best friend, the love of my life. But more importantly, two years ago I lost myself."

Alison hung her head, not expecting this outburst from Emily. She was right though and she knew it, Emily was a whole new person. She noticed that the moment she came back, she stronger, smarter, much more comfortable and confident in herself.

I spent the last two years mourning your death and trying to build a new life without you, a new self. I'm not that lovesick little puppy you used to know, I've changed, we all have," she alludes to the other girls, "I know you've been to hell and back, and I'm not trying to belittle that at all believe me, but you have no idea what I've been through, what _you_ put me through."

After Alison's 'death' Emily didn't know what to do, everything she knew changed and she had no idea if she could overcome it all. She struggled, but she eventually arose out of the depression a better and stronger person than she had ever been, but having Ali back in Rosewood changed that. She could see aspects of that older Emily coming back, she didn't want to be that person again, and Alison was making that really difficult because it's Alison, the love she thought she lost forever. How could she ignore the second chance that had been given to her?

The tears are flowing fast and Emily didn't even bother to try to wipe them away. She was still pacing, angry, but it was silent for a while, neither girl knowing what to say, until Alison quietly began, "If I could go back, things would be different, I would go straight to the police instead of running away, I would—"

Emily interrupted her with more bite to her voice than ever before, "But you can't do that can you?—"

But Ali wouldn't let her take the lead again; it was her turn and cut her off as Emily had just done to her, answering with just as much ferocity, "No I can't! But what I can do," her voice softened, "what I'm trying to do, is to show you I've changed too. I'm not the mean bully I used to be."

Emily scoffed sarcastically, "well you've done a great job of convincing me" alluding to the Mona video.

Ali hung her head in defeat, tears flowing hard. Checkmate.

It was quiet again. Emily stood still, she looked at Alison, really seeing her for the first time this whole argument. Ali sat on the edge of the bed head low, she was furiously wiping away the tears that were falling, trying to hide them but epically failing. It was obvious she didn't want Emily to see her like this. She was broken, truly hurt and Emily saw it. Emily instantly felt bad; she made her way to the bed to sit next to Alison.

Ali was surprised and confused by Emily's sudden proximity, and just stared at her, afraid to move.

Emily's voice became very soft and comforting, "I'm not going to say I do or don't still have feelings for you, because I honestly have no idea what I'm feeling these days. But this," she motioned between them, "isn't going to fix itself overnight. You just have to be patient."

"I know." Ali replied so quietly it was barely audible, her head hung again.

Emily reached up and gently grabbed Ali's face with one of her hands. She wiped away the tears with her thumb.

Ali squeezed her eyes shut tight, as if she was trying to remember every second of this moment and how it felt, not knowing if and when it would happen again. She leaned into Emily's touch sighing quietly.

After what wasn't nearly long enough a time, Ali opened her eyes muttered a faint "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"The tears beginning to fall again and chocking her voice.

Emily rested her head against Ali's forehead whispering, "I know." Ali's eyes say it all, and Emily knows she's telling the truth. Emily leaned forward to place a quick soft kiss on top of Ali's lips, pulling away slowly. And even though things have changed, they knew that this was as great as it had ever been, if not much better.

**A/N: Thanks so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it, it didn't turn out exactly the way I wanted it but I wanted to share it with you. Please review/comment to let me know your thoughts!**


	2. 5X07

**A/N: Hey guys! So I've gotten lots of requests to continue this fic so I figured I'd give it a shot. My plan is to update once a week and each chapter will be in response to the latest episode, whether it be an extended scene, what I believe happened behind the scenes in cannon with the story, or even just a response to what happened in the episode. So today's chapter is a response to 5X07, what would happen in response to Emily's voicemail to Paige from the end of the episode. This chapter is between Emily and Paige, but this is an Emison story so you have nothing to worry about it, don't let Paily deter you from reading. Please review and comment to let me know what you think! Thanks for reading/reviewing/favoriting/following!**

*Set the day after Emily left Paige that voicemail at the end of 5X07*

Paige didn't show up to school yesterday, but it was like she was there cause everywhere Emily turned people were talking about the locker room incident. Upon hearing what happened Emily was overcome with a great sense of guilt, she knew exactly who put that rat in Paige's locker, and knew it was her fault it happened in the first place. The day before, Emily had cornered Paige convincing her to narc on Mona giving up names of her new A-Team. She knew the rat was a metaphoric threat from Mona, a sign that Paige had crossed the line and now she is no longer safe from her crew. Emily tried to threaten Mona to leave Paige out of this, that is was a war she never intended to enlist in. But that still didn't make her feel any better about the situation.

She called Paige last night, getting her voicemail. She wished to apologize and let her know that she was here for her. It was a message she practiced over and over before calling, but as soon as that receiver beeped, all her preparation left he memory. She was immediately overcome with these rambling thoughts. She's surprised she was able to leave a coherent message. She did have a mental slip up, almost saying I love you before hanging up, but what do you expect? They only broke up a few weeks ago, you don't just get over a love like that overnight, but she still felt wrong for almost saying it.

Paige didn't show up to school today either, and Emily never got a response from her. Emily began to worry; maybe Mona struck again and didn't know. She was out of it all day, going from class to class debating whether or not she should call again, if Mona really did strike again the longer she waited the worse it could be. So when the bell rang for the last time that day, Emily was relieved when her phone rang, it was a text from Paige: "You can come over if you want."

She went straight from school over to Paige's house, unsure of what would happen. She wanted to apologize and to make sure she was ok. Emily knocked on the door a few times and waited, clasping her hands in front of her, not knowing what to do. A few moments later Paige opened the door, she was still in her pajamas, making it obvious that she hadn't left her bed all day. She stayed silent but moved to the side gesturing for Emily to come inside. Emily smiled and nodded hello while walking past her into the house. Paige shut the door slowly behind her but never removed her hand from the doorknob. Emily began wringing her hands nervously as they stood there awkwardly.

Emily finally broke the silence, unable to take it any longer, "Look Paige, I'm so sorry about the ra-"

Paige interrupted her softly, "Em, unless you were the one who put that rat in my locker don't apologize." She smiled thankfully though acknowledging Emily's concern.

Emily wasn't going to let it go that easy though, she knew it was her fault indirectly, "But if I hadn't pressured you into narking on Mona this never would've happened." At some point during their conversation they had made their way into the living room, Emily sitting on the armchair and Paige sitting on the couch diagonal from it.

Paige chuckled lightly, amazed at how adamant Emily was to apologize for something she didn't do, "Emily it was just a rat, yes it was scary but it's not like she physically hurt me."

Emily leaned forward resting her elbows on her knees, she knew Paige had a point but she was also aware of how ruthless Mona could be when provoked. "True but what's to say she won't in the future, she ran over Hanna who was her best friend, who knows what she'd be willing to do to someone who gave up names of her minions."

"Hey," Paige reached out to place a hand on Emily's knee, she lingered a moment before retracting her hand, afraid to make things awkward again, "I made the decision to tell you. I knew what kind of situation I was getting myself in to."

Emily shook her head, "I don't understand how you are being so calm about all this, especially since you skipped school the past couple days." She looked directly into Paige's eyes thinking she would see the emotions Paige really felt about the Mona thing.

Paige's eyes shown bright, full of determination, "Cause I know how much this is troubling you, and one of us has to be strong." She blushed lightly, bowing her head so Emily wouldn't see. "I stayed home because I was afraid of what I would do if I ran into Mona."

"Paige…" Emily didn't know what to say, she was grateful that Paige still felt the need to be so protectful of her, but she also felt guilty that she even felt that way in the first place. She believed she was a burden Paige shouldn't have to worry about, not anymore. Paige shouldn't be a target of Mona or A, she had nothing to do with the bigger picture; she was just an innocent player who didn't realize what she was drafted into.

Paige could see Emily's mind racing and tried to calm her down, "To say I'm not scared would be a lie, but you know someone once told me I'm the bravest person they know." They both smiled remembering their conversation in the locker room the week before. Paige had a playful tone of voice, smiling brightly, "Now how would letting a little prank get to me make me look?"

For a moment Paige had succeeded in making Emily smile, but she was quickly back to the rigidness that had marked her face since Ali returned to school, "When are you planning on going back to school?"

"Tomorrow."

The room got quiet again. Emily didn't know what else to say, she had come to apologize and they talked through all that. It suddenly got tense; it's like they didn't know how to be around each other anymore, practically strangers. Emily wondered if she should just get up and leave, but right as she was about to, Paige broke the silence with a question out of the blue, knocking Emily completely off guard.

"Do you still love me?" Paige looked up at Emily who slowly sat down, she had a feeling she wouldn't be leaving until they figured things out. It was like a repeat of the other day when she and Alison discussed things.

She was confused and timid to start this conversation; she had no idea where to begin. "Paige-"

"Sorry to be so upfront about it," Paige said waving her hand, she knew it was such a random thing to bring up, but it was something that's been on her mind for weeks now and she couldn't take it any longer. "I mean, Em, what are we doing?" She looked Emily in the eyes. "I've gotta say everything is a little confusing lately, and I just feel like you're sending me mixed signals." She took in a silent deep breath. She had said it; something that was burning her brain for a long time, now all she could do was wait for a reply, the ball was in Emily's court.

Emily took a moment to gather her thoughts, being careful to approach this subject cautiously and firmly at the same time. "Paige I told you we aren't getting back together." She thought about that night they broke up, she thought she had been clear. "I'm sorry if I've lead you on, but-"

Paige saw where this was going, "You've moved on." She stated alluding to Alison.

Emily quickly got defensive, "It's not like that, well not exactly." Emily and Alison weren't together, at least not officially, and she didn't really know what they were right now, in between? After their talk the other day she could say she was confident Alison actually liked her, but she wasn't sure if she was ready to forgive and forget just yet.

Emily moved to sit next to Paige on the couch. She grabbed one of Paige's hands in her own; tentatively at first thinking maybe physical contact might read the wrong way. "Paige, you deserve someone who loves you solely and completely, someone who will give you their whole heart." She took in a deep breath, "And as long as Alison's in my life I can't give that to you." And there it was. For the first time since she discovered Alison was still alive did she admit she still had feelings for her. It took her by surprise, furrowing her brow wondering if she really just said that. She had been so caught up in wondering why all of a sudden her feelings were clear that she didn't notice Paige had started silently crying.

Emily looked over and saw the girl's tears and instantly felt terrible. She tried to make it better, "I know it's fucked up and I'm so sorry, but I don't want you to ever think I didn't love you…" Paige had hung her head, unable to look Emily in the eye, but Emily put a hand under her chin and brought her face to face with her. "…that I don't love you, because I do Paige, I really do, but not the way you deserve." She took her hand away from her face but still held tightly to Paige's with her other.

It was quiet for a moment while Paige tried to calm her breathing long enough for her to talk without her voice cracking, "I guess I always knew, I just didn't want to admit it to myself." She knew from the day they met how Emily felt about Alison, and part of her knew her heart always belonged to the blonde, even when she was believed to be dead. Alison was Emily's first love as Emily was Paige's and she understood how that first love never really leaves you. She was just hoping she could have her happy ending with her. "I'm not ready for this to be over..."

Emily knew how hard Paige was hurting; it like when she found out Alison had died. Knowing that you will never get to have that chance at love with the one who you love more than anything in the world, it like your heart's been ripped out leaving nothing but a cold hallow emptiness that you feel can never be filled. She knew it was going to be extremely difficult for Paige to get through this, all she could do was hope for the best, "I'd hope we could be friends but at the very least that we don't end up as enemies." She knew Mona had reached out to her to join their side, and even though she had been nothing but protective and loyal to Emily who's to say Paige doesn't take the breakup too hard and decides to join Mona's crew as a way to get revenge.

Paige knew exactly what Emily meant by that statement. She had no intentions as of now to join Mona's team, but you never know what the future might hold. Despite everything she still loved Emily and would do anything for her, and if that meant stepping aside and letting her be with the one who has her heart, as difficult as that might be, she would do it.

They sat together in silence again for a few minutes, seeking comfort in each other's presence knowing it may be the last time they would be together let alone talk to each other. It was the end of a long relationship that was so eye opening and changing for both girls, closure for them, and for Emily possibly a fresh start to begin a new relationship with the one she lost. Emily gave Paige a light kiss on the cheek before getting up and leaving feeling like for the first time in weeks her life was a little bit easier. She got in her car and drove home wondering what the future held.

**A/N: So I wanted to create a respectful end to Paily for this Emison fic. I loved Paily and shipped them hard, but there's something about that love and lost thing that makes me think Emison is meant to be. I hope I didn't upset any Paily shippers (if they are even reading this) with this chapter. I tried so hard to keep it respectful and in character. I would love to hear your thoughts on how I did. Please review/comment. Thanks so much for reading!**


	3. 5X08

**A/N: Hey y'all! Sorry it took me longer to get this chapter up. I had a hard time coming up with an idea from episode 5X08, the whole Noel Kahn thing threw me off and didn't give me much to work with. I hope what I did come with is enough to satisfy you guys until next week, hopefully 5X09 has some good Emison to pull from. I have a cute one shot outlined and ready to write so I'll try to get that posted ASAP so keep an eye out for that. Hope you enjoy the chapter and please coment/review as always!**

*Set in 5X08 where Alison is sitting in Hanna's window ceil and Hanna's mom tells her to get some rest*

Alison was grateful for Mrs. Marin, she was like the mom she never had. Sure Alison's mom had her moments, but there was something different about the way Hanna's mom treated her, with love and care that didn't even for a second come off as fake. She loved her mom and it was days like this Alison wished she were still alive. She was desperate for that mother/daughter relationship all her friends had, the dynamic you see on every tv show, movie, etc. Why couldn't she have that with her mom?

Alison thought her mom was the reason she was so cold and judgmental. She never really knew what love was because she didn't get much of it at home, with a father who was always at work, a brother who was either never home or drugged out of his mind, and a mother who never really treated her with the most warmth. She felt she was unable, and undeserving of love because if even her own family, people who are supposed to love you no matter what, didn't then how could anyone else?

Perhaps that's why she always demanded she was the center of attention at school and with her friends. She strived for that feeling of being wanted and needed, because she didn't get that at home. And that's why she was so enamored by Emily, the only person who truly seemed to love her. Emily always gave her her full attention. And even when Alison would do something to hurt Emily she always came back. She never gave up on her, ignored her, or loved her less. And that is what Alison couldn't accept.

She never understood how Emily could love her, especially after all the shitty things she did to her, the majority on purpose. How even now after everything that's happened to them, all the lies, the deceit, how could Emily still give her the time of day? Just thinking about it made Alison tear up.

And that's the train of thought that brought her here, sitting in Hanna's window, crying her eyes out. She didn't know how long she'd been sitting there, but had she gone to school today she would be in third period, so she could assume it's been a while. It had been a terrible night; she wasn't lying when she told Mrs. Marin about hearing noises and sleeping in the closet. It was definitely one of the most stressful nights since she had returned to Rosewood.

Up until last night she usually had someone sleeping with her or her dad would be constantly checking in on her. Last night she was alone. Hanna never came home; she lied to Mrs. Marin about Caleb picking her up. She knew Hanna was going through a lot of stuff, and that Alison was the last person she wanted to talk to. She figured the least she could do was cover for her.

Alison tried sleeping in the bed, but it felt so big and empty, all that space left her feeling exposed. After hearing the noises, she moved to the closet. Having that extra barrier between her and the room, and having that wall to settle up against gave her the slightest bit of comfort. She wished Emily was there. The only time she is able to fully rest and feel comfortable is when Emily is around. She feels protected, safe, and like no matter what happens as long as she's with Emily nothing can hurt her. She debated whether or not to call her last night. Alison knew Emily would've come running, but she ultimately decided that she couldn't depend on Emily to save her every time she feels scared. It's not fair to either of them.

Alison felt her and Emily were on better terms after briefly discussing their feelings the other day. They were far from being a happy couple, but she felt they were slowly getting there. For the first time Alison actually believed that they could be together, eventually.

Alison couldn't handle being alone any longer; she picked up her phone and decided to call Emily since she didn't last night. She needed her comfort, her presence, her warmth. She got Emily's voicemail, which figures since she was at school where Alison should have been. After being prompted to leave a message after the beep Alison began breathlessly between sobs, as she was still crying; "Hi Em, I'm at Hanna's, she never came home last night, I was all alone, and I swear A knew and tried to get me, I slept in the closet just to feel safe. I'm so tired of being alone Emily, I'm so scared, I need you…I—" Beep. The machine cut her off, _If you are satisfied with your message press one, to play press two, to re-record press three. _Three.

She rerecorded her message again, trying to be less needy this time, once again being prompted to either save or try again. She chose the latter, this time with less cracking in her voice, it was shorter. She continued again and again to rerecord her message sounding more guarded each time, maybe this wasn't a good idea.

She ends up deleting her message and hangs up, no voicemail at all. She stays still, silent, tears slowly falling from her eyes. Why is this her life? What did she do to cause all of this? These among other questions flood her mind, all she wants is to be normal, for everything A related to be over so she can just live and not feel like an empty shell going through the motions. About five minutes later her phone rings, Emily is calling. She picks up with a quick hello.

"Hey sorry I couldn't answer, Mrs. Newman wouldn't let me use the restroom until I finished my quiz. What's the matter? Why aren't you at school?" Emily asks concerned.

"I'm fine." That's a lie. "I overslept this morning," More like under slept. It gets quiet and for a moment she wonders if Emily is still there.

"I'm coming over. Give me twenty minutes." Emily can tell Alison isn't ok, that something happened. She knew she needed her but was too afraid to ask.

"No Em, it's ok." She didn't want Emily to leave school, as much as she wanted to be with her right now. "Hanna's mom took the day off work so I'm not alone. Finish out the day and come over later?" She asked hopefully.

Emily gets a quiet sadness to her voice, "I would but I have plans with Spencer after school."

Alison's heart slumped, she just wanted to see her so bad, but she couldn't ask Emily to drop her life just to babysit herself. "Oh ok, I'll just see you around."

"Ali wait, seriously what's wrong?" Emily wasn't letting Alison go like that.

It's quiet for a moment before Alison breaths in deeply and quietly states, "I just miss you is all."

Now Emily's heart hurt, "You sure you don't want me to come over?"

Alison perks up in her seat, "Yea, I'm gonna go downstairs and see what Ashley is up too."

Emily nods to herself, "Ok well I gotta get back to class-"

Emily was about to say goodbye and hang up right before Alison asks out of nowhere, "Em?"

"Yeah?"

She was going to ask if she could stay at her house tonight, figuring that Hanna will probably stay with Caleb again, but after the dinner party she's sure Pam wouldn't be ok with that yet, "Um never mind, just have a good day, tell the others I say hello."

It's quiet again for a moment, both girls waiting in case the other has anything else to say. Emily finally replies, "Will do, I'll call you later."

They say their goodbyes and hang up. And believe it or not Alison does feel a little bit better, just hearing the concern in Emily's voice is enough to hold her over for now. She decides maybe she should listen to Mrs. Marin and get some rest, so she makes her way over to the bed to take a nap. Just a couple minutes after she gets situated under the covers Alison's phone rings again, this time it's a text, _Maybe we could go out this weekend, a movie or something, you know get our minds off everything if only for a few hours…just the two of us?_

And with those words Alison immediately felt the worry and stress from last night fade away, a big smile worked its way across her face. She replied to the text and quickly got a response confirming what she was hoping was true; Emily fields had just asked her out on a date. Closing her eyes, and thinking about the weekend, Alison was finally able to get that rest.

**A/N: This took a different turn than I expected it to, but I'm satisfied. I was really worried about this chapter cause there wasn't much inspiration from the last episode. Hopefully we get some good Emison interaction next time. Thanks again to everyone who has followed/favorited/reviewed. Special shoutout/thanks to kayweston for letting me bounce ideas around and keeping me interested in continuing this story. Thanks all for reading! **


	4. 5X09

**A/N: Hey guys! So here we are again, another episode passed and still no good Emison scenes. Luckily I was able to come up with an idea in response to 5X09, it might be a short chapter, but from the looks of next week's episode we should finally be getting some Emison interaction. I hope you like this chapter; please as always let me know what you think by reviewing/commenting! Thanks for reading!**

*Set in 5X09 after Alison left Hanna's room to go make a phone call and Emily got a message from her mom having to leave herself.*

Alison was standing in the hallway down the way from Hanna's room at the top of the stairs on the phone with her father. She had a few last things to pack before going and wanted to reassure him she was ok. It wasn't until she noticed Emily bustling past her down the stairs that she hurried off the phone to catch Emily. She quickly said her goodbye to her father and followed Emily down the stairs calling after her, "You're leaving?" her voice sounding hurt and angry at the same time.

Emily continued walking down the stairs and reaching for the door, she answered without breaking her stride or turning back to make eye contact, "You're lucky I'm only leaving cause my mom needs me." Emily was angry at what Alison said back there in Hanna's room. How dare she say she is running out of options of people to turn to when Emily has been here this whole time? She was infuriated that even after everything she and the other girls did to help Alison she still couldn't trust them.

She was able to make it out onto the porch before Alison grabbed her arm forcing Emily to turn around. "What's that supposed to mean?" Ali had questioned, taking offense to Emily's harshness.

Emily just stared at her maliciously; she was beyond angry and hurt. She was sick and tired of feeling like she had no control; like A could continue to walk all over her and she couldn't do a thing about it. She knew the only way they could begin to hold their own against this new A was if they all got together, truthfully and completely, but as long as Alison felt like an outsider to her own group of friends, nothing would change.

"I know the other girls are having a hard time trusting you," she threw her hands up in the air, "hell I do too sometimes, but you have got to stop it with all this lying bullshit! We are all in this together!" Emily took a step toward Alison who just stood there in shock, completely caught off guard by Emily's rant. "You may have been on your own for the past two years, but it's not like that now, so many more people are involved and are affected by this Alison! You have got to stop lying and tell us the truth, the whole truth." She took a deep breath, the yelling taking more wind out of her than she was used to.

"I want to believe you are a different person, a better person, but every time you take one step forward you take three steps back!" Alison had tears welling up in her eyes at this point. Emily was telling her like it was, she was strong, angry, and it was kind of terrifying for her, no one had ever had the guts to rip her a new one, definitely not with this much ferocity. But Alison knew his was coming. She knew one of the girls would get a backbone eventually. She just didn't expect it to be Emily, Spencer yes. Aria or Hanna, maybe. But not Emily. But then again after their conversation the other day she could tell Emily wasn't one to mess with anymore, and in some respects it only seemed fitting that it be Emily to show her her place.

Emily continued her rapid fire shots at Alison, not even fazed by the girls tears, "I don't know what hurts me more, all of your lies, or the fact that I keep believing them." She turned around and started to walk to her car, she only got as far as the sidewalk before Alison pleaded after her.

"Emily please, listen-" She walked down the porch steps toward the fleeting girl, her tears flowing more rapidly now.

Emily whipped around, and the pain and sadness was prominent on her face, no tears yet, she was staying strong on that front. But her resolve was no longer just stone and anger, but was overcome by deep emotion. She had cut her off. "No Alison!" The use of her full name hurt, for the longest time Emily had called her Ali, and hearing her say Alison sounded like they were strangers. "You listen; you've done enough talking for all of us. And if you want this," she motions between them with her finger, "want us…." She had to pause; afraid her voice was going to crack. She cleared her throat, and walked slowly over to Alison and taking ahold of her hands.

Emily looked Alison directly in the eyes, "I love you. I always have and I probably always will. But you broke my heart once, and it _destroyed _me." She dropped their hands and took a step backwards, "And I'm not gonna let you do that again." And with that she turned around and finally made it to her car, leaving Alison standing alone in the middle of Hanna's front yard.

Alison's body racked with sobs, and she fell to the ground. She felt as if her heart had been ripped violently from her chest, stabbed, mangled. The tears were hot and blinding. She was a complete mess. She couldn't breathe, couldn't think. Everything had disappeared and the pain intensified. She was lost in a sea of emotion and didn't even notice Spencer walk up behind her.

Somewhere around the "one step forward, three steps back" point Spencer had overheard and seen everything. She was about to leave herself when she got to the door, which had been left open by the other girls. Hearing Emily yelling and not wanting to interrupt, Spencer had instead begun to eavesdrop. She stood behind the open door, peeking around the corner every now and then.

She was proud of Emily for stepping up and telling Alison to get her shit together. Spencer knew if Alison was going to truly listen to anyone it was Emily. She wasn't naïve; she knew Emily had a special hold over Alison. She didn't know the details of their current relationship, but she could tell by the way the two of them interacted, especially tonight, that something was going on. And when Emily delivered her final blow, "I love you…", Spencer knew this interaction had more to do with the fact that Alison has done nothing but lie since she got back, this was personal. She made a mental note to call Emily later to see if she's ok.

Spencer walked over to the spot where Alison sat on the ground, practically in an upright fetal position, still crying her eyes out. She just stood above her, arms crossed over her chest. Looking down she asked, although it came out more like a statement, "You actually love her don't you?"

Alison, who was unaware of Spencer's presence until she spoke, froze. She did not answer. She tried to calm down long enough to say something but failed, instead she just raised her head to look Spencer in her eyes. Her face was red and blotchy, masquera bleeding, cheeks and eyes wet from the tears that still fell rapidly. It definitely wasn't a pretty sight, but the look in her eyes said it all. That one look confirmed what Spencer already assumed.

"Then be the person she deserves." Spencer said, voice strong, but not having as much bite as usual, and then she too walked away leaving Alison alone for the second time that night.

Spencer's words resonated in Ali's mind, and the sobs started again.

**A/N: So I know it was short, sorry about that. Thanks to everyone for reading/favoriting/following/reviewing! For those of you who haven't checked it out yet, I posted an Emison one shot "The Otter and The Bear" the other day, I'd love for you to read that if you get a chance. Until next week! **


	5. 5X10

**A/N: Hey guys, so how about that episode? Even though it was a huge blow to the Emison ship I believe it's all for the best. I'm so proud of Emily for sticking it to Alison, they both needed that. I do believe Alison has good intentions and does have a game plan that will change everything. I just keep thinking about that interview Sasha did where she said her character will get lots of backlash but Marlene said "don't worry, it's not what you think" So it's not over. I wanted to continue with the angst that was established in this episode rather than write a fluffy chapter. The writers worked so hard, and executed it perfectly, to create that rift, and I just want to honor that with my fic. So please let me know your thoughts, not only about my chapter but about the show, none of my friends watch PLL so I never have anyone to discuss with, so hit me up. Hope you enjoy!**

*Set in 5X10 after the scene of all the girls in Hanna's kitchen, deciding to cut their ties to Alison*

"Tomorrow morning, 9 o'clock don't be late." Spencer demanded of the three other girls before walking out the door of Hanna's house.

Aria had convinced the girls to calm down and at least get a night's sleep to think things over, afraid they were making a rash decision too soon. It's true she was the only one not fully on board with Spencer's plan to use Noel's insurance to turn Ali in. To say she wasn't scared about the cops finding out what really happened in New York would be a lie, but believe it or not that wasn't the only reason she was so adamant that the girls take the night to sleep on it. She was worried about Emily, she couldn't understand why all of a sudden Emily, the most trusting, caring, and loyal person she knew, who also happens to love Alison, is now willing to cut her out completely. Something was wrong, and she wasn't going to ignore it.

Emily had no idea Aria followed her home after they left Hanna's house. It wasn't until she was about to open her front door that she was aware of Aria's presence, "Em? Can we talk?" Emily turned around surprised to see Aria standing there, worry in her eyes, her voice soft, almost a whisper. She walked over to join Emily on the porch, and Emily just motioned to the patio set, then taking a seat next to Aria on the loveseat.

Aria sat there pensively, not really sure where to begin, but before she had a chance to speak Emily was already rattling off, "Look Aria if this is about the cops finding out about Shawna, I understand you're scared, when everything happened with Nate I-"

Aria cut her off by placing a hand on Emily's wrist shaking her head, "That's not why I came here." Emily just looked at her confusion settling on her face, wrinkled brow, crease on her forehead, she silently urged Aria to continue. "What happened with you and Alison?"

Emily was confused as to why Aria was questioning her. "Aria what are you talking about?"

Aria was determined to get to the bottom of this, and urged on, "Emily, I'm not stupid. I can see the pain in your eyes; something happened tonight that you aren't telling us."

Emily got defensive, ignoring the question,"Aria that's not really you're business."

Aria wasn't backing down, "To hell it is. Em, you are one of my best friends and Ali still is too, sorta." She shook her head, "I know ever since she's been back that we've all ignored how it's affected you. With Hanna's drinking, my mom, Melissa, we've been all been ignorant to what's really important, our friendships." She grabbed Emily's hand, "And so I'm asking as a concerned friend, what happened that was so bad that made you of all people turn on Ali?" Her eyes were soft and pleading.

Emily was confused by this confrontation. It didn't make sense to her why now. Alison has been home for weeks. "Aria, it's not like I don't appreciate your worry. I just don't understand why all of a sudden this is so important to you?"

"Because you guys were my last hope!" Aria burst out throwing her hands in the air, completely catching Emily, and herself off guard.

Now Emily was really confused. She shook her head racking her brain to help make some connection here, "What are you talking about?"

Aria, who had stood up with her last declaration made her way back over to the chair, taking a seat next to Emily again. She had her head bowed, hands wringing together nervously in her lap, she refused to make eye contact. "After everything that's happened with my parents' divorce, with my mom and Zack, it makes me second guess my relationship with Ezra, makes me wonder if I made a mistake trusting him again, makes me wonder if love even exists." She looked up to meet Emily's concerned gaze, "The only thing that gave me hope was you and Alison."

Emily is once again taken aback by Aria's words. She placed a hand on Aria's shoulder, stroking lightly to comfort her. "Aria, Alison and I were never a couple." She stated quietly, but the reality of her words made Emily hurt.

Aria noticed Emily had fallen back against the seat; she was receding into herself and knew if she didn't continue she would lose Emily's attention to the inner turmoil she must have been experiencing, "I know, but before Alison went missing, I could always sense you guys had this different connection." She paused forcing Emily to look up at her. "The way she was with you, it was different, and special. I could tell you were her favorite, and it never really made sense to me." Emily scrunched her brow at this, and Aria quickly continued on, "But after she was gone and you came you came out to us, I understood. Thinking back at the way she looked at you, how she would stare when she thought no one was looking, the way her eyes kind of lit up any time anyone said your name, and that smile you know the one I'm talking about." Emily nodded and smiled slightly, she did know. It was the smile Alison reserved especially for Emily, the smile that haunted Emily's dreams and melted her heart. And as of now she wasn't sure if she'd ever see it again.

Aria pulled Emily from her thoughts by elaborating, "I knew she loved you too. I could feel it, like some sort of weird sixth sense. I contemplated telling you after they found her body, thinking it might bring you some semblance of a happy ending." Emily inhaled deeply; if Aria could see it then maybe Alison wasn't lying to her. "And after she came back, I thought you guys would finally get that happy ending, for real. I always thought you guys were the epitome of undying love," Emily rolled her eyes at this. "That no matter how hard life hits you, you'd always find your way back to each other. That if you could still love Alison after all the shit that's gone down these past few years, then there was hope."

The girls were silent for a moment. Emily let Aria's words sink in. She didn't know how to react to it all, but she couldn't believe Aria had so much faith in a relationship that never existed. She contemplated everything Ali had said to her since she came back, even to their meeting in the warehouse. Maybe Aria was right, maybe Alison wasn't lying about her feelings, but she sure as hell lied about everything else. She was so conflicted, nothing made sense and all she wanted to do was scream. Her mind and her heart has been racing non-stop for the past several years, she just wanted for once to have a moment where she didn't feel sick or stressed. Was it too much to ask? She was so caught up in her own thoughts that she almost forgot Aria was sitting next to her.

Emily broke the silence, and for the first time tonight caught Aria off guard, "She knew him."

Aria's eyes went wide, she was obviously not expecting this in response, "Who Cyrus?! She knew him and didn't say anything?"

Emily explained, recalling upon Alison's confession from the day before. "She told me not to tell anyone. She stayed with him when she was on the run. He robbed her, and took a knife to her thigh. Nasty scar. She turned him in. I'm not saying he's innocent, but she was gonna let him rot in prison for crime that never happened, for a lie." Retelling the story made her angry, her temperature rising and her voice quickening. "I confronted her, before meeting at Hanna's. She kept saying she had a plan, that she was gonna make things right. That's what got to me, _she, she _had a plan, _she _was gonna make things right. '_You weren't there' _was another thing she said. _We _put _our _lives on hold to save _her_, and she still has the audacity to lie to _us_?!" Every emphasized word stung, and Emily had to fight to hold back tears. God she was so sick of crying.

Aria was silent. She placed her hand on Emily's shoulder much like the other girl did for her earlier. She didn't expect Emily to continue, "We kissed the night before Toby's house exploded. I did initiate it but only because she kept dropping hints all day that maybe she really did have feelings for me, and like a fool I fell for it. For once I thought she needed me you know, the way I've always needed her. She seemed so genuine…." Emily got quiet again, not knowing what to say.

Aria gently rubbed Emily's back. "Em, maybe Alison really does have a plan, and cutting us off is some weird way to protect us. I mean think about it, all of our relationships have gone through a rough patch no one thought we could overcome. When we found out Toby was part of Mona's A-Team, but only to keep an eye on her and protect Spencer, Caleb uprooting to Ravenswood then returning only to bring Hanna down day drinking lane, but how he stood up to Zack and is getting Hanna off the bottle, and me and Ezra, well you get it. Maybe this is Alison's rock bottom protective moment."

"Wishful thinking." Emily scoffed lightly; Aria had a point but it felt like she was reaching for straws here.

Aria quickly and sternly replied, "We need more of that. We've all been so caught up in whether or not we can trust Ali that we haven't even begun to figure out who this devilish new A is."

The girls went silent again. They sat there in the uncomfortable stillness neither girl sure what else to say. A few moments later Emily spoke up, "Promise me you won't tell the other girls about any of this. I don't need Spencer murdering Alison, adding that to our list of crimes."

Aria smiled at this, knowing Emily's prediction of Spencer wasn't necessarily as far-fetched as they joked. "Of course, and I want you to know you can always talk to me, about anything." She placed her hand on Emily's arm. "I love you Em, and no matter what happens I'm here for you."

Emily smiled in response, pulling Aria in for a hug; she mumbled a "love you too, and same goes" in Aria's ear, letting her friend know that she was here for her too. Neither girl had any idea what would happen going forward, they just hoped that whatever was in store for them that they could retain their friendship and the ones with the other girls. After losing Ali tonight, they couldn't take another loss….

**A/N: Ok so I don't know about this chapter. I thought it was a good idea in the beginning but I don't really know how to feel about it now that it's written. I really do believe Ali and the girls will reunite, but probably not until 5B. I just hope fanfiction can hold me over until then. Please talk to me, we can get through this together! Thanks for reading. **


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